Pages

Tuesday, August 21, 2018

my narrative story

my writing task was to write a narrative that had characters, a setting,
a problem and a resolution.

The opposite twins
By Qyn
Two opposite twins were walking in the white hot sand in Boracay in the
Philippines. Stella is the younger twin, she has light brown curly hair.
Jason is the older twin, he also has light brown curly hair. They are 18.
They were completely opposite in looks and personality.
Stella is girly, sassy and a bit mean.
Jason is kind, brave, tall and has brown eyes.

Stella and jason were walking in the white hot sand and then they found a boat.
Jason asked their teacher, Miss M if they can use the boat.
Miss M was at the other end of the resort.
She yelled “yes!!” to the kids.
So Jason and Stella hopped onto the boat.
Jason started the motor and sailed of.
They were in the middle of nowhere and suddenly the motor stopped.
Stella and Jason panicked.
They were yelling out for help in case a passing boat would hear them.
Suddenly, Jason found a wooden plank floating in the ocean.  
He told Stella to lean out of the boat and grab the wood plank.
Once Stella had the wood plank in the boat, Jason and her paddled hard.
They paddled south to where they had come from.

After an hour of paddling Stella and Jason made it back to the resort.
Stella and Jason were relieved!
Stella and Jason told Miss M that the motor had stopped and they had to
make their way back using a wooden plank.
Miss M panicked, but Jason said that they were OK.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Qyn its Eunize, did you consider that this writing is incredible, one point that was not clear to me was a teacher popes out in the story out of nowhere and you said that Stella and Jason are 18 years old but you made the teacher said "yes" to the kids but I love the work you did and it made me feel like it was me getting mistakes. Good Job!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hey Qyn, I like your writing, it's really amazing but maybe you could make your story interesting by adding big words.

    ReplyDelete

To support my learning I ask you to comment as follows:
1. Something positive - something you like about what I have shared.
2. Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what I had to say
3. Something thoughtful - how have you connected with my learning? Give me some ideas for next time or ask me a question.